Wednesday, 7 November 2007

Go Away, Mitzi

I should be in the middle of high word counts and a story that just won't turn off in my head. Instead my NaNo word count is pitifully low and the story plods along at a snail's pace. I've decided that most of the problem lies with Mitzi. This is the name I have given my internal editor. Or should I say, the name she has given herself - she is just that pushy.

Last year was a test for me. If I could write the 50,000 words, then I would consider myself a writer. Silly, I guess, but I needed that push. Well I did it, with Mitzi happily occupied elsewhere, maybe taking a vacation in Bermuda. But Mitzi came back from vacation in April and has pushed me like a slave ever since. I have been polishing and editing, and still she is never happy, insisting that each sentence could be just that much better, promising me that each character will be deeper and more real with just a few more hours of work. And really, keeping me from submitting anything. It is never quite good enough for her.

Now she hovers over my shoulder with each word, questioning my judgment and reminding me just how much work needed to go into last years manuscript after the challenge was over. "Let me help you," she says, insisting that she could save me so much work in the long run. And she might be right. But I also know I need to pound out the story as fast as I can or I will never get past the first chapter.

She has good intentions. Her favorite thing is a well-crafted story with tight plot lines and believable characters. But somehow, I need to turn her off. Otherwise, this NaNo novel will always sit at the start watching all the other novels cross the finish line.


Josi said...

Oh, I hate those Mitzis of the writer's mind--they can be such monsters. The thing I used the last time I couldn't get her to stop, was I MADE myself write 50 pages without going back and fixing anything. About killed me, really, because I hate writing that way. But you know what? she was so disgusted with my sloppy writing she took off to the South of France, and when she came back she was far better behaved. Good luck, and don't be TOO hard on yourself, it only makes her stronger.

Don said...

I never really recognized it before, but the way I got rid of Ponopono was to purposefully write to most awful sentence I could. Like Josi's editor, he would leave in disgust, freeing me to write without his constant nagging.

Stephanie Humphreys said...

Well, I should have no problem turning off the brain for a minute and writing something truly awful.

Ajoy said...

Mitzi huh? I suppose I need to name my internal editor too. Maybe it will help me identify with me and not an obnoxious thrid person type situation! hehe

I can relate all too well. Go away, Mitzi! Leave my Stephanie ALONE and give her some peace.

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